10 months yesterday... almost a year of my life gone. Amelia still asks why her sister had to go away. I wish I knew.
Last year at Thanksgiving we told everyone that we were pregnant. This year I will taking pretty fall flowers to my daughter's grave. Not really fair is it. But what is fair anyway...
I went to see a new RE today. Not really sure why right now - but it helps me deal with things if I have a project. For the last 7 months that project has been conception. I told myself after the huge dissapointment with IVF that I was DONE - over it - never going there again. That was all of 2 months ago... But now I think I have perspective. Nothing unrealistic - just a glimmer of hope that I don't want to let die.
I'm having another sonohystogram done next Tuesday. Hopefully that will tell me if there is any chance at another pregnancy. If it looks good and the septum really is gone then I'll keep trying. If it doesn't look good and I need another surgery - I'll really have to think about things.
10 months that have changed the course of my life.